Sunday, March 21, 2010

in the mood for a change

this week has been, pretty much a crap week. so much stuff to ponder about, feels so depressed almost every day. i had to rushed to do my literature review this week. told myself to set a deadline to hand it in on monday, but instead handed it on friday. did my lit review until 2AM almost every day, once even at 3AM. and then came the dreaded clinical attachment day. interviewing patients, i wouldn't say is my forte, but finding the right patient is a huge headache to me. for my last clinical, i found a patient with much difficult cases, this time i found one with a case that i felt is too simple, which makes it so much harder to write a report on. thurs and friday were days spend looking for patients to fill in my questionnaires. can you believe i took 3 days just to complete my pilot study? my progress is so so slow. to top it all off, i had to settle some personal problems. money, to me is not the problem here. it is the people. sometimes people around me hurt me more than other stuff. i guess, sometimes we all have our breaking point. i really wished one of these days, i don't have to deal with people anymore. every day, i am seeing the ugly and selfish side of people and it hurts me.

thank you for those who were kind enough to listen to my problems this week. honestly, i really don't want to complain about things that are happening to me, because i feel like those are my problems and that i should handled them myself, instead of dragging people down with me. but after telling everything, i feel a lot better. which is why when a friend approached me with problems this week, i listened to that person and hopefully that person also felt better. what is the use of friends, if not to make our lives easier for one another?

i learned something this week, which is not to get myself all worked up over things i cannot control. what people think of me, how other people feel about me, those are things i cannot control. but what i can control is how i respond to the situation. i guess life is a learning process after all.

it's been a while for me to write something so reflective here. i guess i am feeling a little melancholic after watching God Of Study K-drama. i always get so caught up in TV shows and movies.

sorry for all the wrong punctuation marks. i am just not in the mood to edit everything;)

Saturday, March 20, 2010

masquerade theme is the most-overused theme of 2010…


I realized I have not been properly updating my blog. If I can have it, I want to be a permanent blogger and not worry about my studies anymore. But of course, you can’t always get what you want. Even as I am blogging here, it is with a guilt. I still have my clinical report to do, my proposal for ethics approval as well as tonnes of notes left untouched. I have neglected my studies for a while now while finishing my literature review for my research project.

Last Saturday night, we had Pharmacy Course Nite at Crowne Plaza Hotel. Months before that, Stephanie, my coursemate approached me to ask me to become the Informal MC for that night. I accepted the offer because I see it as an opportunity for myself to challenged myself more, to gain more confidence, and to practice my public speaking skills. Sometimes I feel like I am stuck in a rut, it is good to go out of my comfort zone every once in a while.

Sadly, I don’t think I did as well as I hoped to. Maybe it was the last-minute preparations and the fact that I did not get the chance to rehearse with Amin (my co-emcee) due to time constraints. I think I could have done better. I hope no one expected me to do well, because surely I fell off par that night. I felt nervous and did not speak as well as I had hoped. But overall, I am satisfied we managed to pull it off despite all the complications.

Pics of that nite:~~


Eating early dinner with the boys in my class. They are really funny but quite intimidating as I was the only girl in the table.


Outside, at the entrance. These are some of the few shots I took just before the event started. After that, it was busy busy busy for me…

Left pic: Huey Pin & Lay Sin

Right pic: Ai Li baybeh & Terev Dickxon


With my maknaes who were in charged of registration table: Ai Li & Wei2


Left pic: Carolyn Lee

Right pic: Whole bunch of people at the registration table. Lol. Too lazy for names…


Left pic: My big buddy, Cherh Yun pose with us, his juniors

Right pic: Us girls with Hamidi and Jebarius, the 2 most well-dressed guys in our year (of course, and Terev too-lar)


Left pic: Vannessa who looks more prettier every time I see her…I love her gloves, very Madonna-ish…

Right pic: Yu Siang, who stole my mask. I think he was one of the few people who did not wear any mask that night


Group pic just before entering the ballroom…all 3rd-years


Left pic: I dunno who took that candid shot of me, but yeah, I basically had to wear that mask whole night due to my duty as emcee.

Right pic: Wei Ping aka Lantern Boy preparing himself as protocol.


Lovely surprises from my admirers. Thank you, “Jo Kwon” and “Nich Khun”.


Left pic: Yay love this pic of 7 dwarves…

Right pic: The odd one sitting at our table, hehehe, Yu Siang with my mask (again)…


Both of my co-emcees. Left pic is Walter and Right is Amin. I had to go back-and-forth from BM to English that night to suit my emcees. But luckily, those languages are my forte. Cannot imagine speaking in Cantonese and Mandarin. Sure lagi funny:)

I know the pics a bit blur. Janice such a lousy photographer. Teach her how to use still managed to not catch a nice pic.


I honestly enjoyed watching all the performances that night. I love the ballroom dance that the first-years performed, esp the “Nobody” tango version. I know they copied 2PM + Wonder Girls perf at MKMF 2008 coz I watched that perf before. But I tell you, it was hot…good skinship…tee-hee…

Ah Hang and the rest of my coursemates were awesome singers. Really no easy task but they did well. Kudos!

The 4th-years were so funny in their hip dance. OMG…so cute…and their last perf is also very touching;)

And the highlight was probably our lecturers Dr. Shahriza and Dr. Hanif as well as preceptor Jerry performing with their guitars. OMG, they are so so talented. I always admired people who can play guitars. I think they are so cool~~~!! I am a fan:)

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Finally, after the event – time for photos!!!

Left pic: With our clinical preceptor Jerry, who also played the guitar that night. He was my preceptor for my PC clinical attachment. Scary coz he kept bombarding me with so many questions.

Right pic: Prof Thomas, my supervisor for my final year research project. I am very fortunate having him as my SV. I think other lecturers would probably scold me already because I am so slow with my progress.

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Left pic: Dr. Shirin, our new lecturer. She is so beautiful and so sweet too. Taking pics of us with her own camera somemore~~! YS, you have good taste….kekekeke…

Right pic: Dr. Mohd, one of the “popular” lecturers that night. He is so so so funny and totally sarcastic. Got him for my last clinical attachment (DRP) and he was hilarious :)

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Left pic: My buddy line – 1st year Jojo, 4th year – Cherh Yun and 2nd year – Chye Teck. Sigh, I am getting older and older d…

Right pic: The boys in my year – Ah Hang, Wei Han, Ka Wei and Hock Peng…


And finally, with Stephanie, the go-to person if I had any problems that night. I must congratulate her on a work well done. I can see how hard she worked for that night. Really admire and appreciate her work ethics;)

Sunday, March 14, 2010

friendship or money?

sometimes in my life, i wish i don't have friends who are so calculative.

it just makes me so sad...

Thursday, March 04, 2010

just wanna vent out~

오늘 나는 당신을 보게 기쁘다. 당신을 보아서 여기에서 한다 저에게 보이는 것처럼 나쁘지 않던 오늘 느낌을 이십시오. 나는 당신이 저와 영원히 체재할 다는 것을 그러나 나가 어떤 그릇된 희망도 주고 싶지 않는다는 것을 바란다. 오늘은 참으로 fairytale이었다. 나는 나가 당신과 인 오늘 같이 이었다는 것을 매일 바란다


*Le Sigh*

I don't know if anyone reads my blog anymore. Honestly, I am beginning to feel that my blog is getting boring and dreary.

Worst still, I keep leaving my posts hanging halfway. I never blog finish about my Singapore trip, and also never blog finish about my CNY 2010.

I have my research project work to thank for. I am so far behind that I just feel like giving up already.

Today went to HUKM, awful day as I did not came well-prepared. I think I am going to develop "phobia" (quoted by mr. ys) of hospital already. There are 1001 things to is all so stressful.

I realized I don't really know much about my topic when I know I should know by now. Maybe it is because I have yet to put my heart into my project yet. Maybe I need to see things better, from a different perspective.

I always believed that nothing is impossible, and that anything is possible once you set your mind on it. Which is why, I must keep motivating myself to stay on the right path. I must keep going on, no matter how difficult it is.

Every day, I keep wishing that things would be easier. I hope one day, once I get the hang of my project, things will indeed look out better for me.

For now, there are so little time and tonnes of things to do:
  • Finish up Literature Review
  • Finish up questionnaire
  • Do pilot study
  • Read up on all journals
On top of that, I have an emcee gig for my Pharmacy Nite next week. The rehearsal coincides with the day of my pilot study.




(unless you ask ms blogger first)